Category : Clare Mee

Getting through stoma surgery with a little help from your friends

I have been thinking a lot lately about support networks, at home, work and socially, and I really believe that you can come to terms with your surgery if you don’t bottle it up and don’t avoid people. I know I have mentioned this subject before but think it is such an important part of recovery that it needs more discussion. “If you think someone is being cruel or they don’t understand, then see it differently, turn it around. It […]

Sex & relationships with a stoma

“Some people can’t bear to show their bodies to anyone, because mentally they are not able to come to terms with having a stoma. Others are very confident and don’t mind showing their bodies. I think the issues can lie with the partners too. If you find a loving caring person who loves you for you and doesn’t care about your issues, then the relationship will do well. If you meet someone who is reluctant to accept your stoma then […]

Coping with a stomal fistula

This is an unusual complication of IBD and stoma surgery. When having surgery I didn’t really know about or expect any weird and wonderful extra complications. I know of many with an abdominal fistula, which has its own issues, but I only know of one other with a fistula attached in some way to a stoma. A fistula is an abnormal tract that links two organs and my fistula links my small bowel to the skin right at the very […]

How A Bigger Life Community can help you

There are many communities out there for ostomates, but only a few are welcoming, friendly and inviting to everyone with great features. A bigger life was excellent for Clare, so when we announced our community she was just as excited as us to connect with all types of ostomates. To read Clare’s blog post, head over to A bigger life’s community by clicking here to read more. You can also follow Clare on her blog. Meet Clare

My stoma kit at home and on the go

I was given a bag in the hospital that I could have my supplies in on the go but I feel quite conspicuous with it, it shouts out “ I have a condition”, and it is just an extra bag to have to carry around. I do use it but it stays in the boot of my car as a precaution. ( I understand that it would be different for men with a stoma ) Now I just choose my […]

What does having a stoma mean to me?

Before surgery I would never believe that I would end up with a stoma. I would come across them in IBD literature and worry that it could be me but never really thought it would be. I didn’t have any real thoughts about what it would be like either. I had never seen one and didn’t have an opinion either way because as far as I was concerned it wasn’t me and probably never would be. I had had ulcerative […]

My experience with dehydration

I know that having an ileostomy means that I don’t absorb as much water as I used to, as the large bowel did most of that. I have never been a great water and fluid drinker so knew that I would have to change my ways. My husband regularly said that I wasn’t drinking enough even before my admission to hospital for fluids, but I was sure I was ok. I had my stoma for two years so far with […]

Holiday abroad with a stoma and perineal sinus tract

I have been away a couple of times with my stoma and each time has been slightly different in the way customs have treated me, nothing too awful but still singled out I suppose. The first time, I went through the body scanner and the female customs officer was very caring. I explained about my ileostomy and she took me to one side and said that she would scan my bag on top of my clothes “ No one needs […]

What to expect on the day of elective ostomy surgery

I arrived at the surgical assessment ward at 7am to have my operation to remove and explore a persistent perineal sinus tract. My husband came with me and we were asked to sit in the waiting area first. A nurse then called me and led us to the next room where there were six beds, this is where we get ready for surgery. I didn’t need to use the bed and just sat on the chair. I was introduced to […]

Things I wish I had known about stomas before surgery

There were a few things that I wished I had known before surgery, but having emergency surgery didn’t give me much time. What my stoma will look like The very first thing that I noticed was in the photographs of stomas in leaflets etc given to me by the stoma nurse just before, the stomas were all tiny little neat buds with exceptionally clear skin. I feel this isn’t reality and no one has a tiny bud of a stoma […]